如烟

我坐在床前 望著窗外 回憶滿天
生命是華麗錯覺 時間是賊 偷走一切
七歲的那一年 抓住那隻蟬 以為能抓住夏天
十七歲的那年 吻過他的臉 就以為和他能永遠

有沒有那麼一種永遠 永遠不改變
擁抱過的美麗都 再也不破碎
讓險峻歲月不能在臉上撒野 讓生離和死別都遙遠
有誰能聽見

我坐在床前 轉過頭看 誰在沉睡 那一張蒼老的臉
好像是我 緊閉雙眼
曾經是愛我的 和我深愛的 都圍繞在我身邊
帶不走的那些 遺憾和眷戀 都化成最後一滴淚

有沒有那麼一滴眼淚 能洗掉後悔
化成大雨降落在 回不去的街
再給我一次機會 將故事改寫
或欠了他一生的 一句抱歉

有沒有那麼一個世界 永遠不天黑
星星太陽萬物都 聽我的指揮
月亮不忙著圓缺 春天不走遠樹梢緊緊擁抱著樹葉 有誰能聽見

耳際 眼前 此生重演 是我來自漆黑 而又回歸漆黑
人間 瞬間 天地之間 下次我 又是誰
有沒有那麼一朵玫瑰 永遠不凋謝
永遠驕傲和完美 永遠不妥協
爲何人生最後會像一張紙屑 還不如一片花瓣曾經鮮豔

有沒有那麼一張書籤 停止那一天
最單純的笑臉和 最美那一年
書包裡面裝滿了蛋糕和汽水
雙眼只有無猜和無邪 讓我們無法無天

有沒有那麼一首詩篇 找不到句點
青春永遠定居在 我們的歲月
男孩和女孩都有吉他和舞鞋
笑忘人間的苦痛 只有甜美

有沒有那麼一個明天 重頭活一遍
讓我再次感受曾 揮霍的昨天
無論生存或生活 我都不浪費 不讓故事這麼的後悔

有誰能聽見 我不要告別
我坐在床前 看著指尖 已經如煙

*作词：阿信 作曲；石头
give me some time...

Clueless.

怎么办？觉得好忧郁。。。
有种难过得说不出话来的感觉。。。
脑袋里反复地摸索着，却也想不出一个所以然。。。
我累到不知道该怎么前进。。。
我的身上被大大的蜘蛛网给套住了。。。
我是怎么了？
救我~~

and they say that everyone are born into this world with a purpose..
i guess my purpose of being in sem4 is not bcos im capable or deserve to be in this sem, im jus here to help my friends to tap cards and lend them notes to copy when they din attend for lectures...
not bcos im sick of doin all these, im willing to and feel glad to be able to help as long as im able to, im jus having doubt in myself again...
i got a feeling, that i wun be able to make it to next sem again...
i see 24th batch waving their hands at me liao... die...
yixian, can you be more negative?
im really sick of you and ur weaknesses...
u have so many good friends around you to help you with ur work all along, can you show some results??
there's so much to study... i wonder if i can do it...
can i?

hold on, xian!
remind urself how did u make it here?
u shld know urself very well, dun give up...
dun let everything gone to waste..

忍一忍，再撑多一下下就过去了。。。

So near, yet so far.

last piece of assignment handed in today was otqm...
something cropped up this morning...
heng still managed to hand in the assignment on time..
hope jenny will be fine!
FINALLY...
really tired, burnt lots of midnight oils in this sem for assignments...
once again, received quite a number of help and guidence from friends around during the hectic assignment period... really grateful and appreciated! =)
i have no idea y... i tink my brain is not functioning well nowadays... starting to doubt my capability in getting thru sem 4 and proceeding to sem 5... but its like, im halfway here already.. somemore its wif the help of so many friends that have let me come so far... money, time and effort will be so much wasted if i fail to attain what i have to achieve right now... hais...
im feeling a bit restless... exams are coming too..
dear friends in sem 5 are goin to graduate soon.. its so ridiculous to see how fast the time flies...
hais, will i be able to reach that level too?

这个学期里，熬了好几天的通宵。。。
真是个精神极度紧绷的学期呀！！！-.-
很庆幸，自己的身旁有着那么多乐于助人的好朋友和同学们，都在我彷徨又无助的时候向我这样低能的朋友伸出援手。。。哈哈哈。。。
很感激~ 在这里想给予我亲爱的朋友们一个诚心诚意的祝福，希望大家能在即将来临的考试中得到好成绩！！！财源广进！身体健康！心想事成！万事如意！哇哈哈哈~
几天没睡好，感觉肝快要爆炸了。。。今晚要给它睡个够！=）

I hope you dance.

there's one thing i hope u'll understand.
that not every right or great things u have done have to be praised.
i know u need lots of encouragements and support from others, esp from ur love ones.
however, to be honest, i think ppl still have the right to do wad they think is appropriate.
even if u think they arent doing the right stuff, and believe that wad u did and think is actually correct, that doesnt give u the reason to judge that they are not supportive of wad u're doin right now. we're not kids, always wishing for stickers, stamps, sweets and praises from teacher or daddy mummy whenever we do things correctly or achieve something commendable.
yes i dun deny, by receiving all these treats as an encouragement feels great and does help in boosting ur self-confidence.
but the thing is, we are all growing up le.
face it, u could do a hundred of good deeds or wonderful pieces of work now and have only one or two ppl who can truly appreciate ur hardwork and effort.
other ppl can have a nice loving daddy who can shower them wif care, concerns and love, while u can have a strict daddy who is fierce and always offering you wif canes and scoldings.
y is that so? u may complain 'hey! thats not fair!'
so? life is not, and never fair.
jus as when u're complaining abt how discouraging u are when they din show any support or understand ur thinking and intentions, ask urself, how well do u think u understand them too? try to put urself in other ppl's shoes, pls try. upon reflecting on those stuff which u have done, its not hard not to let others to have doubts in ur capability in succeeding too.
im not saying that i dun trust u, but i really think that there is no need to put up a big fuss wif ur family members over such things.
they are ur family afterall, i believe they do not wish to see u suffer too. yea, i know they may sound a bit harsh or too much with their words, i know its disheartening and painful for u to see and hear them responding this way.. why not transfer your energy and time from complaining into doin something which you really wish to accomplish?
like wad i've told u, perharps this is the challenge post to you by god, to see if u can overcome all these circumstances, to see if u can stay strong and prove to those ppl who think u cant that they are wrong, to make u a better son, a better brother, a better grandson, a better person and perharps, a better man in future?
ur appetite is getting larger day by day, how far can u go?
i know i wouldnt know unless i give u my support and listening ear even if it means to make myself a dull and boring person, i'll still giv it a try.
i know u wun let go without even trying hard to get what u want. and i clearly understand, u're stubborn, and u wun give up. u want to prove to those who doesnt believe in u. i know, i know..
it's a good thing to have a goal in life and be ambitious.
but i truely hope and pray that ur hunger for success will not devour ur true innocent personality completely.
dun forget who give u brain to think?
who give you limbs to move about freely?
who's the one who hold ur hands when u 1st started learning to walk?
who's the one who wipe ur tears when u cry?
who's the one who hold ur hands to write ur 1st letter and ur name?
who's the one who taught to you how to talk when u were urging to communicate to the world as a baby?
who's the one who feed u well when u're hungry?
i know u are disappointed, thus angry. i can see that u do are aware of the reason y ur family is behaving that way, therefore, u shld know what u need to do in order to change their views in u too.
as u are working hard in pursuing ur dream, aspiring to become that somebody, i hope u'll be changing for the good. the main reason for me to support u in doin this is becos i know u want to make it big and prove to those who doubt u, and ultimately, this is something that makes u happy! dun go for success blindly and hurt ur love ones unnoticeablely.
it might be too late for u to realised the precious things which you have lost when u finally make it.
don't make me feel that i dunno u anymore...